1 MAGGIO 2016
There are more and more non-moments, periods of no time, especially when talking with others, when suddenly I am not talking anymore, talking is just happening: there is a flow, a sense of power and wholeness, hands move in perfect synchronization with thought feelings, space expands, and there is openness with no sense of separation – and no “I” that is separate.
The front of the body seems to be nonexistent and I am talking with myself.
Are these the here-and-now moments you are talking about, or is there more, or is it a matter of more, more frequently?
These are the moments I am talking about, but Amit Prem is not yet certain; hence the question. There is still a little doubt, and because of that doubt, those moments are not penetrating deep enough to reach to his very core of being. He is still suspicious, still thinking whether they are or not. That too is natural. The whole conditioning of the mind will stand like a barrier. Even at the last moment it will try to create suspicion, to make you ambiguous, to make you unclear, confused. The mind follows you to the very last moment, and it goes on dragging you backward. It is its old habit; it is what the mind has been trained for. I am not condemning it. I am just stating a fact.
An inveterate pickpocket finally breathed his last and prostrated himself before St. Peter, craving admission through the Pearly Gates.
St. Peter heard him through courteously, but then decreed, “It is hell for you, my boy. And meanwhile, kindly give me back my watch.”
Now, a pickpocket is a pickpocket! Even at the gates of heaven, while Peter is talking, why not snatch away his watch?
Mind is a habit because mind is a mechanism. So when these moments of herenow start penetrating your being, the mind stands on guard and it says, “Watch, you may be in a delusion. Or you may be hallucinating. Or maybe this guy Osho has hypnotized you” – or something. Suspicion.
Now Amit Prem has to drop this doubting. Nothing else is needed.
He asks, “Are these the here-and-now moments?” Yes, they are.
And that’s what a master exists for: to help you in those moments when you become suspicious, when you lose clarity, to give you support.
I say to you, yes, these are the moments; but if you become entangled with your suspicion, you will lose them. They are just happening. It is just the beginning. If suspicion comes in, that will be the end of the beginning; then they will die. They are very fragile right now. You should water them with trust, not with doubt – doubt will prove a poison.
So don’t listen to the mind. That is what sannyas is all about. Why do I insist so much for sannyas? So that when these moments start happening, you can trust me. You have always trusted your mind. It is not worth it, but you have trusted it. The master is a device, so there is an alternative: when there is any problem with the mind, you can choose the master or the mind. These are the moments when the master has to be listened to.
Yes, I repeat it again: these are the right moments. But if you get suspicious, if you think about them, you will miss them.
You are saying: “Are these the here-and-now moments, or is there more?” That again is the mind. The whole trick of the mind is the technique of “more.” The mind always says, “There must be more.” If you have money, the mind says, “Have more money.” If you have power, the mind says, “Have more power.” If you are getting moments of meditation, the mind says, “There must be more.”
“More” is the technique of the mind to confuse you, to never allow you a moment of happiness. The “more” brings misery: “So there is more? So I am not getting enough.” And misery enters. You have compared.
Forget all about the “more.” “More” is a trick of the mind; “more” is the agent of the mind.
These are the moments. Don’t think about the future, don’t think about the past. If you think about the past, the mind will create doubt. If you think about the future, the mind will create ambition.
These are the two tricks of the mind. Look at the past, it creates doubt. It says, “There have been other moments like this also, but where are they now?” Once you had fallen in love with a woman, and how beautiful it was – and then? Then all disappeared. Maybe these moments are also like that. You have fallen in love with this man and something is happening. It is the honeymoon. The honeymoon cannot be permanent; the honeymoon will disappear.
Amit Prem is a new sannyasin; not yet settled in sannyas, still escaping but cannot escape, still trying hard to figure out what is what and not able to figure it out. It is very difficult.
You cannot figure out what I am doing here. My ways are so contradictory, it is impossible to figure it out. My ways are paradoxical. So I say one thing one moment and I contradict it immediately.
He’s still not settled. He has taken sannyas, but hypothetically: “Let us see what happens. Maybe there is something, maybe there is not. If there is not, then who can prevent you? You can move back.” That’s why this suspicion and unclarity and confusion.
If you settle with me, then the past is dropped. It is difficult and hard to drop the past, but unless you drop the past, the mind will never allow you freedom. The mind is your past; the whole accumulated past is your mind. Drop the past, and these moments will penetrate to the very core. And you will not think about “more,” because you think about more only when these moments have not penetrated to the core. When they have penetrated to the core, there is nothing more. And when there is nothing more, there is bliss and benediction.
Ecstasy: The Forgotten Language